Patrick C. Keaveny

The Wordy Coder

Home / Uncategorized / Reviews | Jurassic World | He’s cannon fodder, and he’s cannon fodder

Reviews | Jurassic World | He’s cannon fodder, and he’s cannon fodder

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Initial Thoughts: ALL ABOARD THE HYPE TRAIN.


The original Jurassic Park was a slice of childhood for me. It was an action film that had a sci-fi element, a touch of philosophy, and some great performances from the cast that really drew you in. I remember, as a kid, watching it and its sequels on sick days and weekends. Looking back on them now, I remember a simpler time where I could believe, by seeing dinosaurs on the screen, that anything was possible.

Which made seeing it as an adult that much more enjoyable. The film does a good job of tugging at the nostalgia strings, particularly the opening scenes of the children entering the park, the musical throwbacks, and the numerous characters you meet in the beginning who you just know aren’t going to make it to the end credits. I felt giddy as a kid again hearing the famous Jurassic Park theme and believing, for a second, that anything was possible.

Then the second act rolled around and all that nostalgia ceased.

  1. Once again, the park owners realize they’ve made a mistake because OH RIGHT THEY’RE DINOSAURS AND THEY DON’T LIKE BEING CAPTIVE.
  2. Chris Pratt’s character Owen, despite a good performance, comes off as a massive douche canoe.
  3. Something about the children having to deal with divorce? Or something?
  4. A unconvincing romance shoe-horned in to draw in the younger crowd.
  5. Awful, just awful, dialogue, plot twists, and over used “the military is evil!” tropes.
  6. BRYCE DALLAS HOWARD RUNNING AWAY FROM DINOSAURS IN FREAKING HEELS?

Seriously, who comes up with this stuff? This is trite, unconvincing garbage even by Hollywood standards. Stock characters, stock plots and stock humor abound.

Despite all this, it does somehow leave a nice taste in my mouth. I credit the ability of the film makers to inspire awe, especially in the climax scene, which is pretty similar to the climax scene from Jaws. In other words, despite being campy, over the top, and illogical, it still made me pump my fists in the air and get excited like a kid again. If you see it, you’ll see why.


Final Thoughts: Good, not great, but remarkable if only for the fact that Bryce Dallas Howard is really setting the bar high for what can be accomplished in high heels.